First Pregnancy Test.
January 12, 2021
I've been wondering for a few days about whether I should take a pregnancy test or not. I'm only 10 days late on my period and from what happened in the past 4 months, I'm not getting my hopes up. If you don't already know, I've been THROUGH IT all 2020. I got pregnant in February and miscarried in March at 5 weeks. Then I got pregnant again in August and miscarried in September at 7 weeks. Not even one menstrual cycle had passed when I conceived yet again in October and lost it once more in November at almost 9 weeks. Nes & I agreed to give my body a break in December and decided to stop trying. Since I'm only 1.5 weeks late on my period, I think the chances of me being pregnant again are slim. I still have hope, but I know better than to get excited only for my body to let me down again.
January 13, 2021
When I woke up this morning to get ready for work, I decided to use the last test I had. I couldn't handle the curiosity eating me up all night. Within 2 minutes, the test read YES+ and I couldn't really be happy about it considering the first thing on my mind was "How long is this one gonna last?" Since I needed to be out the door in 20 minutes, I marked the date on the First Response test (1/13/2021) and left it on top of Nes' laptop for him to see. At around 10:00am I got a text from him saying he thought it was candy, but was also excited. Like me, he didn't say much about the positive test since we had no idea if this one was going to stick. According to my period tracking app, I'm currently 6 weeks + 4 days today, but instead of immediately calling my doctor to set up an appointment, I've just decided to monitor myself until I'm at the 9 week mark (counting from my LMP) just to be extra sure.
January 14, 2021
Today I made the bold decision to quit my job on the spot for you. After a long, sleepless night, I realized how toxic my workplace has become for me and you. There was no way I'd be able to call out from work without MK saying something about me behind my back. Everyone knows how she truly felt about me and I don't want to jeopardize my mental and physical health especially in a delicate time like this. Even though I'm still counting down the days I possibly have left with you, I don't regret making this decision. I have take care of myself first. Maybe if I'm healthy, you'd be too.